Yep, I'm being attacked

There are quite a few things that I have had on my mind lately and if I don't let them out, I just might blow my top.  First on my mind is the entire ordeal going on with our youngest son, Cullen.  He is our Aspie.  He's my little buddy and I love him with all my heart.  I would take a bullet for him and I would fight to the death for him.  Fight to the death...That's something we've been having to do a lot of lately.  Because of a certain principal at a middle school on the west side of Martinsville, Cullen's first year of High School is turning out to be very difficult.  It is almost time for school to start, and he barely has a schedule.  It is a very bare boned schedule.  He has not been placed in Orchestra, which he excelled in in his time at the middle school level.  We were not informed, as we should have been, that Cullen would have to audition for Orchestra.  So here we are, three weeks out from the start of classes, and Cullen has not had his audition.  We have emailed the director of Martinsville High School's Orchestra and her response was simple.  Cullen will need to have violin lessons in order to catch up to what he has missed while out of the school on the west side of town.  Remember, he has three weeks to do these lessons and do his audition and get Orchestra put on his schedule for his 9th grade year.  

Frustration is starting to set in as we are struggling to keep in contact with the Orchestra teacher.  Amanda and I have  BOTH tried to reach her via email, only to not hear a response.  Our son deserves the same opportunities that other students have already been given.  I am so aggravated and furious with how all of this has went down that I could just scream.  In no way, shape or form do I think that my son will be the next Wolfgang Mozart (yes, he was a violinist), but I know he enjoys being in Orchestra and enjoys playing his violin and is actually pretty good at it.  He also deserves the same chance to be in Orchestra as everyone else had.  If he does not receive his chance, you can be certain that I'll be raising some hell.  I love hearing my son play his violin.  It is sweet music to my ears.  It is beautiful to me in a way I had never heard before.  I love hearing him play and pray very much that he will get in to Orchestra class this year.

Now on to the second thing that has been eating at me for a while.  Any time I post anything at all on Facebook, I get one of three reactions.  I either get silence, an "I agree" or lambasted.  First of all, let me explain that I post what I want, when I want it.  Secondly, let me say that I could be posting MUCH worse things like crude jokes, nude women or a bunch of political propaganda that has nothing to do with anything. But I don't.  I don't post any of those.  HOWEVER, I do post how I believe.  If you feel differently, that's fine.  But if you ridicule me for how I feel or what I believe, be prepared to be unleashed upon.  I don't treat you like crap for how you feel, and I'll be damned if you do the same thing to me.  So let me lay it all out for you right now so you know EXACTLY how I feel.  And again, if you unleash on me for how I feel or how I believe, then you had better be prepared to get unleashed upon more harshly than you've ever felt!

1.) I believe in PRO-CHOICE!  The only exception is if she uses it as a "oops, I'm a whore" excuse. (Thank you for that line Billy Cooper.)

2.) I believe that EVERY PERSON has the right to get married no matter what gender of person they choose to marry.  You have the right to choose who you want to be with for the next few years before you end up cheating on your spouse with a co-worker and then wind up divorced.  Gays have that same exact right!!!  To deny them that denies them one of their civil rights!

3.) I believe that MOST Republicans are morons.  No explanation necessary.  You're just idiots.  One of your heroes is that douchebag Rush Limbaugh.  He honestly believes that The Dark Knight Rises is a movie that was made by Democrats as political propaganda.  Freakin' retarded!!!

4.) I believe that a HUGE AMOUNT of Christians are the most closed minded group of people on the planet.  And I'm a Christian!  Don't believe me fellow Christians???  Just read through numbers 1 and 2 again and you will prove my point.  

5.) I believe that Jesus is not white at all.  He was born in the Middle East.  He grew inside of a Middle-Eastern woman.  2 + 2 DOES NOT equal "Apple".  Geez...

6.) I believe that ALL races and religions of people should be treated as equals.  Just because someone has a different view in their beliefs does not mean I'm superior over them.  It just means that they've found something that works for them.  Cool.  Except for Scientologists.  They can go f*&k themselves!

7.) I believe that MY WIFE is the most important person in my life.  If you decide to take it upon yourself to verbally attack her, I WILL strike like a viper.  I will not be pleasant, and I will treat you like the p.o.s. that you are.  GOT IT?!?!

8.) I believe that I make tons of mistakes every single day of my life.  I believe that I've made mistakes in my life that most folks could never even fathom in their wildest dreams.  I absolutely, 100% believe that I am not a better person because I have found faith in Jesus.  Since I feel that way, I would really appreciate it if you didn't think you're a better person than me because you don't believe yourself to be a sinner.  YOU'RE NOT PERFECT!  GET OVER YOURSELF!!!

9.) I WILL NOT change my mind because you THINK you're right.  If I'm wrong, then I'll deal with it once I get in front of the big guy.  Then I'll explain to him that all I wanted to do was to love EVERYONE the way that His Son told me to do!  So you might as well keep your closed minded, ignorant thoughts away from me.  Cause I'll come at ya.  

10.)  Why am I doing all of this?  Why does it seem like I'm reverting a little bit back to my old self?  Well those are two very interesting questions.  Both of which I have an equally interesting answer.  Because f*$k you, that's why!

    

Musings of a MAD man

I have SO much to blog about.  It has been so long since I've actually done this.  There are so many things that I have to say, and this is really the only forum where I can do it and be free to do it and say whatever I want.  I am going to include quite a few videos in this blog as well.  I hope that you take a moment to listen to them and allow the music to speak to you.    

I first want to talk about my job.  I absolutely love it!  I have been there since June 25, 2012.  I never thought it was possible to find a place of employment where I actually enjoy being there, but I have.  I get to work with my former BK boss and get to work with two former BK co-workers.  I enjoy being with such great friends again, and I love the new craft that I am learning.  Casual dining is so different compared to Fast Food.  Many more menu items to learn, and believe it or not, it is a much faster pace than Fast Food.  But nonetheless, I love it.  I have a great boss and have met some truly amazing new co-workers who's friendships I will always cherish.

The next topic I want to discuss is an event that is happening in the very early part of September.  I have the privilege of conducting the wedding ceremony of two of my former BK kids.  I recently became an Ordained Minister to do this for them.  I'm really excited about it, but very nervous at the same time as this is my kids' big day and I don't want to mess it up.  I have lots of time to practice before we get to the shindig, but I'm still nervous.  So, Cody, Tay, there will always be tough times.  There will always be disagreements.  There might even always be struggles.  But remember, 100% of the time, Love Never Fails.  I would like to dedicate this song to the two of you in advance of your wedding.

Of course, being able to conduct the ceremony of my two BK kids is only one reason why I became an Ordained Minister.  The other reason is so I can use it as a tool to draw more near to the Lord.  I know that I have fallen far from His grace and mercy, but I also know that He still loves me as I am.  I am a sinner and it is lucky for me that Jesus is a friend of sinners.

There is a line in the above song that says, "Open our eyes to the world at the end of our pointing finger."  Man...talk about an eye opening line.  I think we are all guilty of this at some point.  Some perhaps more than others.  I know that I'm very guilty of it.  I was the lost cause.  I was the outcast.  But You died for sinners just like me.  And I thank you for that my Jesus.  Thank you.  So I am hoping very much that by becoming an Ordained Minister that I can have a closer relationship to Jesus.  Learn to walk closer to Him, and learn that every person, no matter their background.  No matter their story.  No matter what they've done to me, deserves love.  My ex brother-in-law.  Who has done some terrible, terrible things to me and mine.  He deserves love and forgiveness.  My Mother.  Who has turned her back on me and has told me to stay away.  She deserves love and forgiveness.  Jesus clearly gave us ALL one last command when He said;

 "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." John 23 34-35

If that doesn't tell you that we are supposed to love everyone, no matter what, then I don't know what does. This is an area that I struggle with immensely.  I want to love everyone.  I try to love everyone.  I defend "the least of these".  But I struggle so much with forgiveness.  So the Lord decided to bring this song into my life.

The first time I heard this song I knew that I had to forgive those who have wronged me.  God had brought this song into my life to help change me.  He brought this into my life to help make me a better person.  I have to admit, I don't know where my ex brother-in-law lives.  But I would love to tell him face to face that while he hurt me in a way that no person has or will ever hurt me, I forgive him for what he has done.  I guess that it will just have to do for now, knowing that I forgive him.  Even though I'm not able to tell him face to face.  I would also love to be able to tell my Mother that I forgive her as well for disowning me and turning her back on me.  But I know what her response would be.  She would tell me that she does not need forgiveness, because she has done nothing wrong...And she really does believe that.

Now I want to talk about the events of today.  The shootings in Aurora, Colorado.  I do not know anyone that was in that theater.  I don't know their names.  I may never know their names.  But these events have left my heart shattered in pieces.  I am so saddened by what this agent of evil has done to these people in their time of escape from a world that is fracturing all around us.  Today our world fractured even more.  A monster walked into Theater #9 at around 12:20AM, during the Midnight Premiere of The Dark Knight Rises, and opened fire.  Killing 12.  Injuring 59 more.  I'll never know any of them.  

So why is this tearing at my soul so much?  The answer is simple.  Can you not see the answer staring you in your face?  It is because I TRULY DO LOVE everyone.  I have taken Jesus' final commandment that He gave us to heart.  I care too much and I love too hard.  When someone is caused unnecessary pain, I hurt with them.  When I climbed into my car this morning and first heard the news of what had happened mere hours before, I was stunned.  My chin fell in my lap and I tried to pick it back up again.  As more details quickly emerged in the 45 minutes that it took me to get to work, I wept with the news of another life lost.  When I got home and finally had a chance to talk with my wife about everything, I cried once more.  Not because another life was lost, but because I had put two and two together and realized that my best friend had went to the Midnight showing of The Dark Knight Rises last night in Indianapolis.  

I understood that with all of the shootings and murders that happen in Indianapolis all the time, this horrific massacre could easily have happened in ANY Smalltown, USA.  It could have happened in OUR Smalltown, USA.  And it could have been my best friend who lay lifeless on the floor of that movie theater.  I wept.  My thoughts and prayers go out to everyone involved in Aurora, Colorado.  Including the shooter.  Even though tonight he was one of hell's assassins, he is still a child of God, and he deserves the Lord's grace and mercy just like we all do.  

So to the families, the victims, the officers that have seen too much throughout this out of the ordinary day, I would like to dedicate this song to you.  Just watch what happens when the hurt and the Healer collide.

A fellow blogger who was in Theater #9 posted her thoughts on the events once she got home and had a chance to calm herself and her kids.  Take a moment to read her words.  They're very powerful.  Check her blog out here.

I will try real hard to keep blogging.  Please understand though that I work very long hours and the time that I do have at home, I enjoy spending as much time with my wife and kids as I possibly can.  As always, leave me some comments if you'd like.  I won't get offended at all if you disagree with anything that I have to say.  I won't matter at all.  Because I'll still love you.